Anxiety & Overthinking Counselling in Brentwood
You may spend a lot of time thinking things through, anticipating what could go wrong or replaying conversations afterwards. Even when part of you knows that you are overthinking, it can be difficult to switch your mind off.
You might worry about making mistakes, disappointing someone, saying the wrong thing or how other people will react. At other times, anxiety may show up physically — tension, restlessness, a racing mind or a sense that you need to stay alert and prepared.
I offer face-to-face counselling in Shenfield, near Brentwood, for adults experiencing anxiety, overthinking and the pressure of trying to manage uncertainty, expectations and other people’s reactions.
When your mind keeps looking for certainty
Anxiety often involves trying to get ahead of uncertainty. Your mind may keep searching for the answer that will finally make you feel sure enough, prepared enough or safe enough.
You might replay conversations, plan what you are going to say, imagine different outcomes or keep checking whether you have made the right decision. Even after you have thought something through carefully, another doubt can appear and start the process again.
This can be exhausting because the problem is not always a lack of thinking. Sometimes the thinking itself becomes the way you try to reduce discomfort, even though it only gives temporary relief.
Counselling can help us look at what feels so difficult about uncertainty and what happens when you are not able to resolve things immediately.
Replaying conversations and worrying about what you said
You may find yourself going back over conversations long after they have ended. A small comment, awkward moment or change in someone’s tone can become something you analyse repeatedly.
You might wonder whether you said too much, not enough, came across badly or upset somebody without meaning to. Even when there is little evidence that anything is wrong, your mind may keep returning to the possibility that you have made a mistake or damaged the relationship.
Sometimes this leads to reassurance-seeking, apologising when it may not be necessary, changing what you were going to say or avoiding conversations altogether because you do not want to risk getting them wrong.
Counselling can help us explore what makes these moments feel so important and how much responsibility you take for managing how other people think or feel about you.
You may also find my article “Why do I shut down during conflict?” useful.
Trying to get things right and avoiding mistakes
You may put a lot of pressure on yourself to get things right. Mistakes can feel more significant than they appear to other people, particularly if you worry that they will lead to criticism, disappointment or a loss of confidence in you.
You might spend extra time checking, preparing or thinking through what could go wrong. Sometimes this helps you feel more in control, but it can also make ordinary decisions feel heavier than they need to be.
You may notice that you are much less forgiving of yourself than you would be of somebody else. Even when something goes reasonably well, your attention can move quickly towards what you could have done better.
Counselling can help us understand what makes mistakes feel so difficult to tolerate and how closely your sense of safety or self-worth has become tied to getting things right.
When anxiety affects what you say and do
Anxiety can affect more than how you feel. It can also shape what you say, what you avoid and how much of yourself you allow other people to see.
You may hold back because you are worried about being judged, misunderstood or creating tension. You might agree when you would rather say no, avoid asking for what you need, or keep quiet until you have had enough time to work out exactly what you want to say.
Sometimes the anxiety comes afterwards. You may replay the interaction, question whether you handled it properly or wish you had responded differently.
Counselling can help us pay attention to the point at which anxiety begins to narrow your choices, so that you can become more aware of what you want and what makes it difficult to act on it.
If asking for support is one of the places you notice this, you may also find my article “Why is it so hard to ask for help when you’re used to coping?” useful.
When anxiety starts to affect your body and daily life
Anxiety is not only something that happens in your thoughts. You may notice it physically too — tension in your chest or stomach, restlessness, difficulty sleeping, feeling on edge or finding it hard to relax even when there is no immediate problem to solve.
You may become more watchful of what is happening around you, more sensitive to changes in other people’s tone or behaviour, or find that your attention is constantly pulled towards what might go wrong next.
Over time, this can affect concentration, sleep, relationships and your ability to enjoy things that would normally help you switch off.
Counselling can give us space to notice how anxiety shows up in both your mind and body, and what helps it build, settle or return.
How counselling can help with anxiety and overthinking
Counselling can help you understand not only what you are worrying about, but what happens inside you when uncertainty, criticism or the possibility of getting something wrong begins to feel difficult.
You may already know that you are overthinking or putting too much pressure on yourself. The harder part is often noticing the moment when anxiety starts to take over and your choices begin to narrow.
In our sessions, we can slow those moments down and pay attention to what you notice in your thoughts, emotions and body. We can also explore what you are trying to prevent, control or protect yourself from when your mind starts working harder.
Understanding why you become anxious is one thing; responding differently while the anxiety is actually happening is another. The aim is not to eliminate all uncertainty, but to help you develop more awareness and choice when familiar anxious reactions begin to take over.
Why work with me?
I have completed more than 800 supervised counselling hours across private practice, community counselling and hospice bereavement work. My original training was person-centred, and I am undertaking advanced postgraduate training in Gestalt psychotherapy.
I work in an active and relational way. I will listen carefully, but I will also ask questions, share what I notice and pay attention to what happens while we are talking — particularly the moments when you become tense, lose your words, start second-guessing yourself or become preoccupied with getting something right.
This way of working can be especially useful if you understand your anxiety intellectually but still find yourself reacting in the same familiar way when uncertainty, criticism or pressure is actually happening.
Face-to-face counselling for anxiety in Shenfield, near Brentwood
I offer face-to-face counselling for adults from my practice in Shenfield, near Brentwood, Essex (CM15).
Sessions are 50 minutes, usually weekly, and the fee is £70 per session. I also offer online counselling where appropriate.
Before booking a full session, you can arrange a free 20-minute introductory call. You can tell me a little about what has brought you to counselling, ask any questions you have and get a sense of whether working together feels right.
Questions about counselling for anxiety and overthinking
Do I need to have an anxiety disorder to come for counselling?
No. You may simply notice that worry, overthinking or self-doubt are taking up too much space or affecting your sleep, relationships, work or ability to switch off. You do not need a diagnosis before coming to counselling.
What if I already know that I overthink?
That is common. Insight can help, but knowing that you are overthinking does not always make it easy to stop. Counselling can help us look more closely at what happens when uncertainty or pressure appears and why your mind moves towards analysis, checking or reassurance.
Can counselling help if my anxiety is mostly about other people’s reactions?
Yes. You may worry about disappointing someone, saying the wrong thing, being criticised or being misunderstood. We can explore what makes those situations feel so difficult and what happens to you when another person’s response starts to matter more than your own position.
Will counselling stop me feeling anxious altogether?
The aim is not to remove every anxious feeling. Anxiety is a normal human response. The work is more about understanding what intensifies it, recognising your familiar reactions earlier and developing more choice in how you respond.